Same Risk, Less Stadium.
Winter 2008
If I've learned something in my 25 years, it's that there's two type of people - those who want things and go about acquiring them and the people who want things but don't do a fucking thing about it.
I definitely fall into the latter. Having been to Buffalo Memorial Auditorium (former NHL arena) and ranking it in my top 3 explores ever; I knew I always wanted to do Tiger Stadium, but never went about getting it done. That's why it's good for me to have Don around sometimes because he pushes me to do things I don't want to do on my bike, with females and in relation to going inside things.
The problem with Tiger Stadium was that Don had already been there.
Around 2004, before I had stepped foot inside one building in the D; he had been biking with my other boy, Dylan, when they rode by Tiger Stadium. Both wanting to check it out, they simply put their bikes in Don's Caravan and hopped the fence in front of a bus stop full of people. They went in the press boxes, they ran the bases, they sat in the dugouts...
I would continue to hear this story for the next 4 years. I would also see the occasional picture of the inside, courtesy of Team Lazy or Wide Open D; causing me to ponder the possibility of going inside even more.
The problem was that I always remembered the guards. I remembered the part in Don's story where they crawled across the floor while the guard had his feet up watching TV. I also remembered how FOX tv showed a group of guys pay off the guards to get inside (and the subsequent firing of said guard).
Time passed and I watched as they demolished over half of Tiger Stadium, leaving only the area from foul pole to foul pole. (The previous two pictures are from the summertime - before I left for Newfoundland).
When I returned at Christmastime, Tiger Stadium sat waiting on a decision on whether to preserve the remaining portion or to finish demolition. I knew this decision was due sometime soon, so I made it a point to take a look at possibly doing Tiger Stadium while home for the holidays.
I made no mention of this to Don. He had said long ago that he was fine with seeing what he saw there and never returning...but if I wanted to go, then we'd go. Knowing this, I jerked my head and examined Tiger Stadium whenever we rolled down Michigan Avenue - contemplating a more risky day versus the relaxing days I had planned.
What I noticed was that the fence was mashed down at a good access point, as if people had been climbing there and checking out the inside. The security mostly sat in the opposite corner, with an obstructed view of this entry.
The whole thing suddenly seemed a hell of a lot more plausible, simply because that fence top was slightly mashed down.
I dropped it on Don as so: after grabbing some White Castle 2 blocks away, I proposed we drive around Tiger Stadium and take a look at what is going on. We drove around, saw the guard chilling in his normal location and I pointed out the fence mashing to him.
"Looks good. Are we going in?" He responded.
This was my last day in D for a long time, so while I wanted to do this at night, I knew we were meeting Chad & Crawl in an hour or so & that would mean consuming mass amounts of malt liquor. This job had to be done now or never.
I told Don that we were going to do this, so we parked the car and packed our things. We made our way over to the fence mash point and looked both ways - realizing that Michigan Avenue doesn't really have a point with zero traffic flow. Also, a guy waiting for the bus was eying us the entire time. "Fuck him, what does he care?" I postulated.
Once the traffic became relatively clear, we caught the foothold and made our way over the 10 foot fence. My outstanding agility meant about 10 seconds or so atop, until I eventually said "fuck it" and jumped to the ground. We were now, finally, on the other side of the fence - I had finally manned up and went about getting inside.
The Trumbull Avenue fence had blown down just days prior, so every passing car could spot us if they looked to their right as they approached Michigan & Trumbull. Therefore, we scurried with alacrity towards a hole I had noticed earlier; about 50 feet from the fence climb. A piece of plywood made this entrance difficult as both of our 6'3'' selves had trouble scissoring over the flimsy board. One leg, one nut, other nut, other leg - it was that tight.
Being inside the fence brought about a stream of adrenaline, but now being inside Tiger Stadium brought about a Danube sized flow of adrenaline. I turned to Don with a smile from ear to ear and apparent jubilation - his response: "it's about damn time."
Anyway, the first area we entered into contained some cooking equipment and various utility rooms. We exited out of there into the above beige brick hallway. For some strange reason the walls were covered in sharpie tags and we wondered, construction workers? random people? both?
Mysteries, mysteries.
Moving from the empty beige brick hallway, we came into the ground concession areas. Don commented on how cleaned out the place was compared to 2004.
We moved through what remained of the ground floor and found little more than concession stands and utility rooms. The walkways out to the field were blocked off with plywood, giving us a sense of security.
Nevertheless, we wanted to move through here quickly, so we moved onto the second level so that we could get out and see the seats.
The overhang of the third level, the various support pillars and miscellaneous rooms provided us enough cover. If someone were parked and really focusing they could see us, but otherwise we were good...especially when we creeped over and checked that the security guard was still relaxing in the same location.
We walked the half circle and checked out what the second floor had to offer. More concession stands, but also bathrooms! While there may have bathrooms on the first floor, I didn't bring my flashlight so I had no idea - I only saw these washrooms because Don pointed them out.
D: "Oh god. It's those fucking troughs."
N: "Ha. A guy on Dyes! said he'd give $350 for one of those..."
D: "Oh really? $350? Hmmm...think we can get it out of here?"
N: "No, man, no, focus! We're not stealing a trough!"
Unfortunately for us, all of the concourses from the 2nd to the 3rd level were locked and gated up.
Therefore we crept out to the edge of the walkways which led from the 2nd to the 3rd level. Don peeked out and saw where the guard was at a couple points and we found one where we concluded that he would only be able to see us for 3-4 rows worth of seats...and that was if he was paying attention.
It seemed like a good idea at the time.
After telling Don to hold on a second so I could take the above picture, we hastily rushed outwards and up the staircase into the 3rd (and top) level. We quickly went all the way to the top in hopes of getting to the press boxes - not realizing there wasn't a walkway at the top of the 3rd level!
Now...now we were sticking out like sore thumbs. So we took to sitting behind the last row of the nosebleeds. Don hastily took out his camera while I snapped a grip of pictures of what stood before me. I couldn't believe where I had found myself - I was in complete disbelief and it was so surreal that it felt like I was watching a movie as opposed to real life.
It was around this time that we saw the D Police drive by. We ducked and chalked it up to coincidence.
Trumbull is a busy thoroughfare, that's logical.
Nevertheless, we didn't want to push our luck. Don began to put his camera away before I asked him to take one last picture - one of me up there.
The best part of this is that he would put this on facebook and make it look like we just relaxing up there when we were both quite worried and nervous.
It was at this time that UJ called Don. She had called just a few minutes prior and knew where we were. They were now at the Trumbull fence and she was telling us that the security were now driving around with that DPD truck we saw earlier.
Oh shit.
We looked down to see UJ, Chad and Crawl standing at the Trumbull Avenue fence gawking at the stadium. As we noticed them, Don told me to get down again as the security - DPD truck convoy turned the corner again.
Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit.
Don proposed that we had a good hiding spot up here and that we should just hang tight. I thought this was an absolute terrible idea as I thought they would soon enough come sweep through the building - we needed to get the hell out of the stands and into some sort of dark room.
Where we were currently, there was only one way up and one way down - which also contributed to my feelings about getting to said dark room. Listening to this, Don said it made sense and asked UJ if she saw the security-cop convoy...she didn't.
So we made a break for it. Well at least as fast as break as you can make down some goofy square steps while trying to not tumble down and off the third deck to our deaths. As we neared the ramp, maybe 7 rows to go, Don started yelling, "oh shit, there's the cop, hurry, hurry!"
I zoomed down the remaining stairs and took the turn down the ramp. We moved one way, then another on the second floor, knowing, just knowing, that the cop saw us. At first we went into an old Little Caesar's concession, past the cash register area and into the back cooking area. Not content to hold tight there, we decided to make a break for it and get the hell out.
Fast walking through the 2nd floor to accomplish speed and silence, I mistakenly let Don get too far ahead as I saw him suddenly duck into a door. "Duck out...duck out!!!" he yelled at me as I had nowhere to go. I rushed to close the 15 feet between us before ducking into the door where he had hid.
D: "We're fucked. He saw me. I looked right at him."
N: "The guard? The guard was on the floor?!?"
D: "Yeah, I thought he saw me, he must have saw you. Just sit here, be completely silent."
Don peered out the doorway as I looked around the room. We were in some heating room and there was a small hole smashed out of the wall to my right. Don turned around and said he didn't see the guy, and that we should wait it out here. I proposed going into this mystery hole and he concurred that it was a good idea.
So the two of us climbed into this hula-hoop sized hole about as quiet as we could for our physical attributes. The hole led to some strange room beneath one of the concourses up to the third level. There was a pinch of natural light and the floor was covered with uncomfortable boxes.
Don called UJ for an update. Somehow none of them saw us make a run for it, but they did see the guard and were seeing him currently. We got the update that this giant guard was walking through the stands with a baseball bat. Nice!
The good news though was that UJ said he wasn't agile big; that he was gumpy and waddled. This relaxed me a bit as I knew I could outrun a waddler if it came down to it. The problem was we couldn't get past the scissor board or the 10 foot fence climb quickly; so we decided to wait it out.
We called UJ a few more times as we could; but overall we were trying to conserve minutes as Don's pay-as-you-go phone was down to 4 minutes. On the first call UJ said he was still walking through the stands (this was 20 minutes later), and then on the second call UJ said he had moved his car onto the diamond and was staring up at the bleachers. Neither of these were very comforting and I wondered how long we'd be sitting in this mystery room for. I was hoping against a repeat of waiting out security just to get caught leaving.
My feet were really starting to grow cold while my back was starting to ache from the awkward position. About this time we heard the smacking of a bat on seats and the guy whistling as if he were looking for his lost dog. We both pondered how dumb he was for giving up his position.
The pain in my feet and back subsided with the thought of baseball bats and deportation.
Thankfully, after about 40 minutes, UJ called and told us the guy moved down to his car and was about to get inside. We had figured he would get cold and this logic seemed to be accurate. A few minutes more and UJ told us that he was inside his car and that she hadn't seen the DPD in a good 30 minutes. Things were on the up and up.
Don and I both climbed out of the hula hoop hole. I waited in the room as Don army crawled over to a good vantage point and spotted the guy in his car. Returning, he said, "He's in his car. Lets get the fuck out of here. Stick to the wall. Just hop the fence. No point in looking. Just take your chances with a cop being there - it's more likely that he isn't."
N: "Yeah, that's what I was thinking."
D: "Do you know where the exit is exactly?"
N: "Yeah, well, um, yeah I'm pretty sure."
D: "Good enough. Let's go!"
We returned to our power walking ways and moved out of that room, across the second level and down a walkway; chugging along as fast as we could while still remaining relatively quiet. Don stopped for a second to place 50 cents on the ground as it was clanking around in his pockets too much.
I overran the room where the missing board was before realizing and turning around. We went into the room, quickly (and loudly) scissored that damn board, and ran across the courtyard area within the fence. Without looking back for Don I put my foot on the white foothold, clamored up and over the fence in 3 seconds flat. As I was atop the fence I spotted Chad's Impala rolling casually by with Ryan hanging out the window filming. Oh boy...what timing.
A few seconds later and I braced the fence with my back as Don came over. A homeless man walking by looked at us bewildered and continued on with his day. It was probably not even the craziest thing he's seen today.
We crossed Michigan Avenue to be less suspicious and generally slow our roll. We walk until we are parallel with Don's car, crossed the road and quickly got the hell out of Dodge.
D: "I didn't think we were getting away with that one. Ok, I'm done with that place now,"
N: "Really, you thought we were done for?"
D: "Um, yeah! You didn't?!? Also, I've never seen you climb a fence faster in my life."
N: "When it comes down to it, I get shit done."
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